


stay in reach

by talonyth



Series: Kagehina Week [3]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-27
Updated: 2014-05-27
Packaged: 2018-01-26 18:19:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,712
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1697972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/talonyth/pseuds/talonyth
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hinata wants to make sure but he feels like Kageyama might slip through his fingers and it makes him uneasy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	stay in reach

**Author's Note:**

> Yoooo, here we go, this is the third Kagehina week day and I should absolutely move my ass to work instead of writing this but hey, priorities, y'feel? Anyhow, the prompt was Promise as you all probably guessed and the idea itself has been on my mind a lot although there were also different outcomes planned. But I somehow feel like this one would be the most accurate.

It is March, and it is chilly. The wind is rushing over the fields of grass relentlessly.

“Will you do it, Kageyama? Will you take up the offer?”

It sounds strange to him, his own voice. As if it isn't his. Maybe that's the wind too. Maybe it just warps his tone to the point where he doesn't recognizes it. Or maybe it is because he lies flat in the same field of grass the wind is attacking. Kageyama sits next to him, unmoving.

“It's a one-time opportunity,” he replies quietly. The gusts have destroyed the usually so neat-looking hair of his. His eyes are looking into the distance. Hinata isn't sure they are fixed onto something like his are fixed on Kageyama. He sees him breathing in and out, regularly, blinking a few times as the wind makes his eyes tear up.

“So you'll take it.”

Hinata's heart beats fast as he looks up to the sky. The sun sets slowly, painting the light blue scenery with specks of gold and orange. Of course Kageyama will do it. That is out of question.

“So I don't know. Why do you feel the need to talk for me? I never said I was going to take it, I only said it's a one-time deal. So what if I do?”

He sounds mildly annoyed but willing to talk unlike any given time in the past. He has always been honest, almost brutally so at times, but Hinata never thought Kageyama was much of a talker. He isn't, really but over the three years they played together it seems like the other has learnt to keep up with Hinata's pace in terms of communication. That will be important to him once he joins another team.

“That'd be great. That is your dream.”

“And if I don't?”

The words echo in Hinata's head. It's probably because of the wind. It distorts the sounds around him. He is sure of that.

“That'd be dumb,” he eventually says and it is an honest sentiment. “They are a really strong team and they recruited you already. We just graduated last week but you already have an offer from one of the strongest teams in Japan. You can't say no.”

There has never been a single doubt within Hinata that Kageyama would get scouted. When it happened, he remembers slapping over Kageyama's back so hard that his hand stung even when he got home. He still feels the frustration in his chest as he realized that, suddenly, Kageyama was a step ahead again.

“I can.”

“You wouldn't say no.”

“What if I would?”

The sounds are drained out. No more. The wind is gone, the grass unmoving, not tickling his cheeks anymore. There is no sense behind Kageyama's words. None at all. Hinata's eyes are still locked onto the dark-haired figure next to him and for the first time, Kageyama turns his head to him to look at him. He seems serious. He is serious, Hinata can tell.

Swinging up, Hinata sits up, straightening his back and staring right back at Kageyama.

“You don't have a valid reason for saying no,” he starts. His breath feels short, somehow. “Tell me one reason you should decline. I bet you have none except for really stupid things like 'I'm not ready yet' or 'I can't cooperate'. Like hell it's valid to say something like that by now. You of all people know how much you changed from the very first time you were at Karasuno. Or should I remind you of how you said you were going to do everything by yourself, I mean how stupid were you?”

With mockery in his voice, he imitates Kageyama's pouting face but he is sure it just looks silly. He has never been able to do it well, not even after all this time.

“Don't start that thing again, you dumbass.”

Hinata swears Kageyama's ears are red but he decides to continue nevertheless.

“See, you don't have a reason. You're just wavering because you have some existentialistic crisis or something.”

“It's 'existential', even I know that much. Don't use words to sound smart if you're going to get them wrong. ...And what if I do? You wouldn't just decide without thinking if it was like this for you.”

“...I'd say yes in a heartbeat. But it isn't like that for me. I never got an offer like you did.”

The silence spreads out and suddenly, it seems like the night set in right when those words fell. The sky is still clear, the sun still visible but Hinata's vision feels dark as he says it. He isn't jealous of Kageyama. He has no reason to be. He knows that Kageyama worked just as hard as he did so he'd never think of being jealous. But the possibility of Kageyama advancing, perhaps too much for him to catch up, it is scary. Over three years, he never thought of not playing with Kageyama but now that this point has arrived – it is fear running down his spine. The sentiment of security is gone. Even though he swore to defeat Kageyama eventually, that sort of oath is something he doesn't remember any longer. Kageyama is still the one player in his eyes that is worth surpassing. They are still rivals as they are friends by now. But they are not in a team anymore. They are not allies anymore. And not being Kageyama's ally is frightening. And lonely.

“That's my reason.”

“What?”

Hinata is sure the wind is back, tugging at his ears. It doesn't let the sound through. How nasty. It makes Hinata feel like it does it on purpose.

“That's my reason,” Kageyama repeated firmly. Still serious, his eyes show his determination. Hinata knows that sort of look. “I might have gotten an offer but you didn't.”

“What does that have to do with anything? This is about you, not about me.”

It never crossed Hinata's mind before but perhaps Kageyama thinks the same. They are known for having the same thoughts, whether they are good or bad or really stupid. They have always understood each other even though they supposedly didn't get along. It almost makes Hinata chuckle to think about it.

“My dream is to stand on top of the world.”

“Yeah, I know,” Hinata replies. He never doubted that.

“What is yours?”

“What? What are you up to?”

Mild confusion rises within Hinata. The sky has darkened, shades of purple and dark blue striking through. There are no clouds, it is going to be a clear night. Only the wind remains noisy.

“Just answer already.”

There it is. Kageyama's rude demeanour. It has been a while. Or well, not really. But it certainly feels like this conversation already goes on for hours. Days. Months. Maybe even years. Or maybe that is just Hinata's wish. He takes a deep breath before he answers.

“...Well, the same.”

“Yeah, you see? You told me when I asked you. If you will stand on top of Japan and the top of the world if I do. You said yes. And I thought the same. That is my dream.”

Hinata barely ever heard someone else speaking as frankly as Kageyama always does. His attitude is terrible, albeit much better than in earlier times, but if there is one thing Hinata always did is trust Kageyama's words even if they were harsh. All of his except for those he says about himself. Those are usually rubbish. Piles of untruths about his ability and improvement. That there is none. That he still has ways to go. Well, he certainly isn't the best yet so it is admirable that he strives for more but Hinata always thought that Kageyama never gave himself the credit he deserves.

“But you have the chance to, now! If you don't take it---”

“To do it alone. But I am not alone with this.”

No. Not anymore. Once abandoned by his own teammates, Kageyama understands the notion of a team. And of not being lonely. Perhaps he really is too used to feel surrounded by others. Hinata feels something akin to pride bubbling in his stomach. It has all been worth the effort. But if that is the reason for Kageyama to put himself down and refuse an offer that could change his whole life for the better, Hinata thinks he might overdo it. Although along with pride he also feels guilty as relief spreads within him. Relief that Kageyama might stay in reach after all.

“...It's not like it was a promise or anything so it's not like shove needles down your throat if you go ahead and do the thing,” he says with a laugh and pats Kageyama's back. He should do it. That Kageyama. It's a great chance. It would be a waste to let it slip. Hinata's thoughts are genuine but his feelings betray him.

“...So it was not?”

It almost slips out of Hinata's mouth when he sees Kageyama's dejected face.

It was. But Hinata doesn't tell him. The longest time he thought it was silly. Silly to think that Kageyama even remembers this sort of thing. He used to be so self-centered. He would have never thought of declining such an important offer just for the sake of doing it together.

“I'll catch up to you. Just accept the offer. I have always been faster than you so it'll be a no-brainer for me to catch up to you. Just you see. And that, I promise.”

The words come out faster than his mind processes them, his body moves on its own accord. He stretches out his pinky finger to Kageyama to seal the promise. This time, as his voice sounds like himself again – the wind finally shut up, the sun has gone to sleep now – he definitely makes a promise.

As he feels Kageyama's pinky finger wrap around his far too tightly - it almost hurts – despite his sour face and grumpy mumbling of how Hinata has definitely not always been faster than him, Hinata can't help but grin so brightly that his cheeks go numb. It's as easy as that. There is no way Kageyama will be out of reach as long as they have this promise.


End file.
